Bunchland

What the cool parents are reading today:

1. An essay from a woman who swore she’d be a different type of mother than her own, but becomes her mother anyway. Is that inevitable?

2. Dealing with a teen daughter? Or maybe you just want to be prepared for when you have to deal with a teen daughter? Here are some tips for dealing with a teenage drama queen.

3. A good or not-so-good divorce question: How do you keep a good relationship with your kids’ grandmother now that she’s no longer your mother-in-law?

4. A 46-year-old man who never thought he’d be a dad looks at the ultrasound photo of his yet-to-be-born twins.

5. Tell me you haven’t done this lip-synch yourself in the car:

Last week: One Millions Moms boosts JC Penney via boycotts, what moms really think about their Mother’s Day gifts and what new moms and teen boys have in common.  Read more...

What the cool parents are reading today:

1. All your helmets and guard rails are paying off: the Centre for Disease Control released a report saying that child accident deaths are way down.

2. Lego admits that Lego for girls was poorly thought out. A girls’ advocacy group, SPARK, sat down with Lego to discuss the problems with the “Friends” line. “SPARK asked that LEGO include more girls and women across all LEGO lines (the lines are at present 86.6% male), include more children of both genders in all LEGO lines as well as the “Friends” line, and include more non-stereotypical activities for girls as “Friends” expands. Basically, this means architecture, firefighting, space exploration, etc.”

3. Why you don’t stay together for the kids: parents who yell at each other all the time are affecting their kids’ brain development.  Read more...

Precious Chong blogs about co-parenting alongside her ex and his new fiancee

Even in a harmonious divorce and an amicable co-parenting situation, there are still painful moments that take me by surprise. One year Jack made Mother’s Day gifts for Sarah and me; they were not the same (shame on you daycare!) and to be frank, mine was the shittier one. I cried in the bathroom of Family Thai talking to Viktor on my cellphone, while Wes, Sarah, Jack and Wes’s mom ate dinner. Not my proudest moment.

Or when the mom at the school playground asked me where Jack’s mom was and I had to tell her that, in fact, I am Jack’s mom. I then promptly asked her when her baby was due to which she replied “I’m not pregnant.” Again, I am not proud of myself.  Read more...

What we’re reading today:

1. The number of kids with ADHD in the U.S has just about doubled since 2000. Doubled. Sometimes, when diagnoses goes up, it might just mean that we’re better about identifying things, or maybe over-diagnosing things, but wasn’t the over-medicating heyday more like 2000?

2. There’s a $180, 000 nanny. Um, where do we apply?

3. Rebecca Eckler learns the dark side of mommyblogging — when your kid gets old enough to use Google image search.

4. A woman who left her husband and kids for six months to go research in Japan and subsequently broke up with her husband has been receiving death threats for her bad mothering.

5. Do we all know and love PS22? Here they are covering Whitney Houston!

Photo by Ed Yourdon via Flickr

New apps may lead to more smiles in the court room and beyond

As web-based help becomes increasingly available for divorcing couples, judges are now officially turning parents to online sources to manage their families post divorce. Results have shown that couples taking their issues online has allowed them to tame the emotions that threaten their families and traumatize kids.

One woman from Maryland deemed co-parenting impossible when her high conflict relationship made her divorce impossibly complicated. Kelly Collis found relief with Our Family Wizard, a resource that offers shared custody calendars and visitation schedules, expense tracking, and messaging. The tool also helps parents can stay up to date on their kids health records, school info, and immunization histories with the information bank. It has an iPhone app so you can stay organized wherever you go.  Read more...

Precious Chong blogs about co-parenting alongside her ex and his new fiancee

Wes and I have had a recurring argument over two things. But really it’s just one thing. Well, it is two things, but I’m going to talk about one of them today.

It’s over the amount of video games that Jack plays.

Yes, I know. He shouldn’t play any video games. It’s bad. It’s violent. It’s not good for his brain development.

But…He loves them.  He is obsessed with them. He loves them so much that he likes to watch YouTube videos of 19-year-old nerdy boys playing them while they make dumb jokes.

So.. we’ve set up a schedule and that’s that. Right?  Uhm no. You see the thing is… I think Wes can be too rigid while Wes thinks that I’m not clear enough with limits and follow through.  Read more...

Precious Chong blogs about co-parenting alongside her ex and his new fiancee

“When I’m with you I miss Daddy and when I’m with Daddy I miss you.” Jack cried as I held him on my lap.  Mind you, this was after a tantrum of yelling and screaming (full disclosure: by both of us) because I wanted him to do his homework before he ate some ice cream.  But it was also after he had been at Wes’ for a couple of days.  I need to remember that the transitions are usually tricky for Jack.  Basically he’s leading two separate lives.  I mean we do stuff together too so it’s not completely separate but that only goes so far.

It makes me sad writing this.  Jack wants us all to live in one house, then he wouldn’t have to miss anyone.  Read more...